VIRGIN OR DISVIRGINED: EXACTLY WHAT TO DO IF YOU ARE NOT A VIRGIN

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Growing up, a woman’s virginity was such a big issue and a high value was placed on it.

From time immemorial, a woman’s virginity has been seen as one of her most prized possessions and a certain respect was accorded to any woman who remained a virgin till marriage.

But with modernization came a new school which places less value on a woman’s virginity. These days, virginity is even seen as a curse. Girls have no qualms losing it to the first man that comes their way.

In the days of old, a maiden was expected to go into marriage as a virgin. If on the first night after the marriage her husband discovered she was not a virgin, her family gets instant condemnation.

But civilization has substantially changed the way people perceive virginity. It a good thing and at the same a bad one.

Today, there’s so much pressure on girls to gain sexual experience before getting married as some men do not want to marry a woman with no sexual experience.

Most girls who have friends that are already sexually active feel left out when they are discussing their experiences, hence the urge to also experiment for themselves.

Virgins are really very scarce these days as majority loose it before the age of 22. Some girls even compete among themselves who would be the first to lose her virginity.

But what is the big deal about virginity? Could it be the secret to a happy marriage?

Well, After our comprehensive research with over 100 women, we concluded that being a virgin does not guarantee a happy marriage but it earns trust. “ You might be a virgin, but ur attitude and character is zero ,”

There is high tendency for men to have a higher level of trust for a lady that kept herself a virgin till he met her. It simply shows she has self discipline.

Though it is not very easy, but it is possible.

 

But on the other hand, If you are no longer a virgin. It still doesn’t change any thing.

We’ve all been hurt. You can’t be an adult — or teen — alive today who hasn’t experienced some kind of emotional pain.

It hurts. I get that.

But what you do with that hurt is probably more important than the hurt itself. Would you prefer to get back to being an active liver of life? Or do you prefer to ruminate endlessly about the past and something that cannot be changed?

In short, how do you let go of past hurts and move on?

The only way you can accept new joy and happiness into your life is to make space for it. If your heart is filled full-up with pain and hurt, you can not be open to anything new in your life.

So, I want to quickly share with you 3 key ways to kill your painful past and move on happily with your life. Let’s find out…

First, Make the decision to let it go.

The past don’t disappear on its own. You need to make the commitment to “let it go.” If you don’t make this conscious choice up-front, you could end up self-sabotaging any effort to move on from this past hurt.

Making the conscious decision to let it go. Stop refreshing the past pain, stop going over the details of the story in your head, stop thinking of the other person every time.

Know it today that it is your choice to either hold on to the pain, or to live a future life without it.

Second, Stop blaming others.

Being the victim feels good — it’s like being on the winning team of you against the world. But guess what? The world largely doesn’t care, so you need to get over yourself.

In every moment, you have that choice — to continue to feel bad about another person’s actions, or to start feeling good.  You need to take responsibility for your own happiness, and not put such power into the hands of another person. Why would you let the person who hurt you — in the past — have such power, right here, right now?

No amount of rumination of analyses have ever fixed a relationship problem. Never. Not in the entirety of the world’s history. So why choose to engage in so much thought and devote so much energy to a person who you feel has wronged you?

Blaming others for our hurt is what most of us start off doing. Somebody did something wrong to you and you want them to apologize. We want them to acknowledge what they did was wrong.

But blaming someone else for our hurt can backfire, as blaming others can often leave you powerless.

Third. Focus on the present

Now it’s time to let go. Let go of the past, and stop reliving it. Stop telling yourself that story where the protagonist — you — is forever the victim of this other person’s horrible actions. You can’t undo the past, all you can do is to make today the best day of your life.

When you focus on the here and now, you have less time to think about the past. When the past memories creep into your consciousness (as they are bound to do from time to time), acknowledge them for a moment. And then bring yourself gently back into the present moment.

Remember, if we crowd our brains — and lives — with hurt feelings, there’s little room for anything positive.

Finally; Forgive them and also forgive yourself.

We may not have to forget another person’s bad behaviors, but virtually everybody deserves our forgiveness. Forgiveness isn’t a sign of weakness. Instead, it’s simply saying, “I’m a good person.

Forgiveness is a way of tangibly letting something go. It’s also a way of empathizing with the other person, and trying to see things from their point of view.

There’s no reason you need to keep beating yourself up over it. If you can’t forgive yourself, how will you be able to live in future peace and happiness.

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